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Friday, August 20, 2010

"Tell me a story of your most fondest memory of a time with a loved one."

I think I remember it going something like this:

Walking into a local coffee shop it was pouring down rain. My hair had that weird awkward hump from my pony tail that I took out from work. I had my top part of my scrubs off so it was just my long sleeve shirt and  my blue scrub bottoms. To give you a better image I looked terrible. Think of the word terrible, and it was me. I saw a guy that I thought was handsome as heck, which pretty much made me look away almost instantly. (I talk like I have all the guts in the world but I really have nothing to show for it) All I could think was "please don't let him be the one making my drink". Why? I have no clue. There is apart of me that is absolutely terrified of the worst possible things that could happen in a short period of time, and I really like that coffee shop, I want to come back if there is no catastrophic disaster that ive managed to create just by doing simple things like walking, breathing and talking. All I could think of was not to stutter or make it look so completely obvious that I was attracted to him. I had it all played out in my head. First I would step forward and knock the tall coffee glass tear holder display box letting about 50 glasses crash to the ground. One of which would fall on top of Mr.Handsomes head and spill my nice hot mocha coffee all over his crotch. He would probably yell some really bad cuss word, something probably beginning with the letter F- "Can I help you?" Mr. Handsom asks me. 

"Yeah" as I continue to order my drink he smiles at me, Im hoping im not some bright red color or unknowingly flashing a sign that read "ASK ME FOR MY NUMBER!!!!!!" thats outlined in glitter and christmas lights. "You work around here?" He asks. "Yeah, just up the street actually" I say forcing myself to stare at him in the eyes out of habit from my grandmother telling me how rude it is not to stare someone in the eyes when speaking to them. "I gotta say something and it might be a little blunt" he says. "Oh great, here it comes, the insult" I think to myself. "Your freckles are fuckin adorable" he says. And that was the second time I had ever had a heart attack. The first time was when I was shadowing a nurse in the E.R and a child had flatlined. Okay, so it wasnt really a heart attack but it felt like one. My heart got all rapid fast. I couldnt say anything but I did make a noise. It sounded like a really quiet duck. "Thaannkkss" I say, which manages to almost sound like I was completely unflattered and wished he'd never talk to me again, which ALWAYS happens to me after someone compliments me.

I come to the conclusion this guy thinks I'm a total tool and need to GTFO. I grab my coffee and head out of the door. "Hey! Emily!" Handsome says running after me. I cringe and panic thinking "I bet I left my keys or phone" I turn to face him and he has a pen and paper in his hand. "Can I get your phone number?" He asked. "Sure!" It was like I yelled it like if a 9 year old went to disney and mickey mouse just asked the 9 year old to be best friends. I really didnt think he was going to call me, or text for that matter but he did right as I was pulling out of the parking lot "You are so damn cute" which leads me to my third heart attack of all time. I didnt rush anything with handsome. Handsome actually became my best friend of the universe first, it really wasn't till he "could feel something wasnt right" and showed up at my window one night when I finally let my guard down. I had been feeling super overwhelmed one night over things that would take too much time to explain. He climbed in my window all shaky, wiping the tears from my eyes and kissing me finally after I had waited so damn long. It made me cry even harder but it was one of those "Dear God finally!" cries, like all the pain I was feeling literally vanished into thin air. 

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