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Monday, September 13, 2010

We cannot restore

Things you should know mondayerificfantasicalmagnificent 

- It takes 10 bottles of tea that you buy at any department store, made by a giant corporation, to administer all the antioxidants a single bag of tea made at home does.
- If you have a hot boyfriend/girlfriend and they post picture of themselves that looks decently nice, the wrong reaction would be to yell and tell them they are an attention whore. You should be happy such a beautiful human being puts up with your psychotic ass.
- Talking out loud in public when there isn't a recipient there to answer you makes you look crazy, so stop.
- Don't get too lost in your dreams.
- Falling asleep with make-up on doesn't mean you will look just as pretty in the morning.
- If you know you are the type of person to over-react over something silly, like innocent comments to your boyfriend from other girls, you should take the time to ask yourself if it's worth you feeling like an asshole in the end. If you think it is, discontinue reading my blog.
- Pounding, hard sex, is not always best and in most cases unacceptable.
- Multiple orgasms, Guys learn it.
- The definition of administer: To Give.
- The definition of apply: To put onto.
- Soul mates are real.
- Just because happy endings are only in fairy tales doesn't mean they don't exist.
- Educate your ears by listening to all types of music, and enjoying it.

- If your marriage didn't last longer then a year then you fail at life. (unless you weren't the one who wanted a divorce in the first place)
- Divorce/Cheating are not a "normal" part of life.
- Fuck without a condom, means for happier sex safe lives.
- Remember this isn't "insert your name here" world.
- No one should ever stop you from your happiness.
- If you don't want to take someone's advice, thats cool. But if said person's advice turns out to be the better judgment, You should probably listen to what they have to say from that point on. Just sayin...
-  Confidence is the most sexy thing a man can have. Over confidence is the most unattractive thing a man can have.
- The mating game is a confusing one that it seems not many of us are very good at playing.
- If you have a crush on someone, try not to be so available all the time. Act like you have a life at least, outside of dreaming of your crush.
- Nice guys do finish last, only because your dream girl let douche dude get eaten by a zombie knowing you would get there soon.

"Take my misery, I give all of it.
Take one chance, I'll be there.
Offering all of myself I give everything,
for my last opportunity."

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